BALTIMORE, Md. — Local showgoers were shocked and dismayed after witnessing punk band, The Baby Hitlers, vanish completely during their performance moments ago, according to…
CHATTANOOGA — Local three-year-old Joseph Rhoades is finally getting some goddamn respect in his household after finding his father’s semi-automatic handgun behind a bookshelf in…
PHOENIX, Ariz. — Local bassist and film studies drop-out Will Levey reportedly refers to his new love interest, Allison Alonzo, as “the Nancy to my…
ORLANDO, Fla. — An alarming new report revealed that Nickelodeon executives have been using the set of ‘90s game show “Legends of The Hidden Temple”…
EASTHAMPTON, Mass. — Local police officer James Kehoe was stripped of his Sergeant rank after his two semesters of D.A.R.E. classes didn’t result in him…
VANCOUVER, British Columbia — Popular internet personality and self-described “human serviette” Nardwuar shocked artist Josh Augustin of the indie band Vansire with an incredibly personal…
It’s the same routine every morning. I wake up, do some light stretches, and check to see that the people I hung up on the…
LOS ANGELES — A relatively obscure film from the Indianapolis Police Department titled “Officer William Jameson’s Body Camera Footage 3/19/21” was awarded the Emmy for…
Dog breed discrimination has to stop. By the way people talk about pit bulls, you’d think the breed is some kind of ticking time bomb.…
Did we just discover a real life Freddy Krueger? This high school janitor from Springwood, Ohio totally got his ass kicked by some teens. Wild!…
Charcuterie boards have certainly had a surge in popularity lately, and it’s easy to see why! The mouthwatering variety of salty meats, decadent cheeses (drool),…
UNITED STATES — 2021 calendars across the country report that Christmas is only 183 mass shootings away, sources who are counting down the days from…