MINNEAPOLIS — Local man Jeff Abrams made a complete ass of himself after blanking on the lyrics to Daft Punk’s “Around the World” during his…
WEST HARTFORD, Conn. — A previously too-cool-for-school music snob is reportedly just inebriated enough to loudly appreciate AC/DC’s “You Shook Me All Night Long” playing…
Inspiring: Introvert Breaks Out of His Shell by Going to a Bar To Look at His Phone
For most self-described introverts, a night on the town is something that’s generally avoided. But local introvert Alex Lorenz has been breaking out of his…
Hold onto your hats partners, because the most sensational extravaganza of the year just blew into town. We may have just witnessed one of the…
Man at Bar Whose Pickup Line Actually Worked Has Literally No Idea What Happens Next
SIMSBURY, Conn. — Local NFT enthusiast Harris Woods was dumbstruck at a Chili’s on Saturday night when after years of being shot down, his pickup…
Bartender Dumps Full Beer Onto Floor Every 15 Minutes At Dive Bar To Keep Ambiance
MANCHESTER, N.H. — The Foxhole Saloon, bartender Mickey Stevens reportedly maintains the trashy ambiance of the bar by dumping a beer on the floor every…
Bartender Has No Idea Regulars Consider Him a Close Friend
EUGENE, Ore. — Leo Radler, a bartender at local pub The Swampland, is completely unaware that many of the regular patrons of his place of…
Local Bartender Using Same Three Adjectives to Describe Seventeen Different Beers
COLUMBUS, Ohio — Local bartender Zack Kenton, 28, reportedly used the same three adjectives to describe at least seventeen of the bar’s signature beers, leading…
Help! I Just Remembered My Karaoke Song Has That One Really High Note
Hey, uh, bit of a situation here. I’m a few measures into my song and just realized I made a grave mistake. The bridge has…
Fuck! My Attorney is Getting Drunk at the Same Bar as Me
Ugh, what a day. I never want to see the inside of a courtroom again! Seriously, you drive drunk through one backyard, end up crashing…
It’s almost 2 a.m., you’re at the end of your shift, and you want to send a gentle message to the remaining bar patrons: go…
Hey, you. Yeah, the guy with black square-frame glasses and skinny jeans. Sorry, I was just minding my own business, enjoying the show, when I…
Metal Singer Practices Screaming Simply By Trying To Have Normal Conversation In A Bar
SALT LAKE CITY — Local Metal Singer Caleb Blackburn recently found that the secret to honing his screaming skills is to attempt to have any…
20 Death Cab For Cutie Songs You Can Listen to While Waiting For Your Date to “Come Back From the Bathroom”
You finally got a match on your favorite dating app. They’re cute, they seem to have their shit together, and most importantly have agreed to…
I Went to This Bar Disguised as Glenn Danzig Only to Discover He’s Also Been Banned Here
Last weekend, I was thrown out of my favorite bar for being “too aggressive” after attempting to throw a chair at someone who said I…