Black Metal Band Sacrifices Animals, Sex Lives

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MINOT, N.D. – Winters In Sodom may be new to the Minot metal scene — forming just six months ago — but the band has already made a name for themselves with over-the-top theatrics that include sacrificing live animals and their sex lives.

“We are the black death that looms over this city and we shall summon the terror from hell and make it here on earth. Also, we’re not really good with women,” said vocalist Blake “Necrohellbastard” Donaldson. “We aren’t even killing real animals — these are all really lifelike molds I make in my garage. It takes me forever. The key is using real fur I get from brushing my cat, Leonard.”

Dealing with years of desolate North Dakota winters and the bleak prospects of any of Winters In Sodom getting laid, the ensuing frustration spawned the lyrical content for their latest release, the Pagan Hellscape EP.

“You know, we tried dating apps and everything, but it really got us nowhere, so we said ‘forget it,’” said Donaldson, noting no one was impressed with his corpse paint skills or his limited Norwegian vocabulary. “I guess no one wants to date a bunch of brutal dudes. Someone should invent a dating app for people into satanic black metal. Then maybe we’d have a shot.”

Without the constraints of active sex lives, Winters In Sodom have carefully crafted their sound to become a driving force in the North Dakota black metal scene, playing shows with some of their major influences.

“Our biggest show so far was opening for Behemoth — we realized we needed to go all out to impress all our friends at school who bought tickets from us,” added bassist Clyde “Lucifurious” Santini. “We had three fake cats that we slaughtered on stage and everyone just seemed really upset at us. The fake blood and guts were really convincing. One girl gave me the finger. Honestly, it kind of hurt my feelings.”

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While Winters In Sodom is patiently pooling their money for a trip to the highly influential Oslo-based record store Helvete — amassing about $60 since the start of the band — Donaldson explained how his lifestyle still helps his loved ones sleep easy.

“The band weirds out our families a little, but our moms are pretty glad no one wants anything to do with us romantically,” he said. “They don’t have to worry about us coming home with a kid.”

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Article by Gregg Harrington @xturnpikegatesx. Photo via Robert Bejil.

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